When you're gone.
This week is, suck-ish. So many things that i prayed hard not to happen, happened. And whatever the case, i've hurt many. There's so many things i wish i could say, i want to say, but nothing comes out of it. I hate myself for not being able to express myself properly to others, especially when its you. I hate myself for not being able to understand, so many things others are trying to comprehend to me. I hate myself for not being compassionate, for not being able to comply to you. I hate myself for not being able to face up to reality.
What else can life have in stalk for me? Being down is already bad enough. Fever, a really bad throat, cough. So much to worry about, so much to do. Ah, i just need someone to tell me the right way of everything, so that everything will just fall into place again. Fuck. How much i hate life.
All the hours that was spent in the past, worrying about a thing that didn't last.
You still shine, like a pink lava lamp.
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